Work Suck!

7 Apr

Now, I finally said it. Ok, let me explain. I love programming. I enjoy the process of finding a solution to a domain that is still unknown. I enjoy making tradeoffs between making an application fast and making it functional. But I have to admit, I don’t enjoy work that much nowadays. I feel like dragging myself every morning to work. Even at work, I question myself sometimes, asking questions like “is this all there to my life? Where is the excitement?”.

Maybe I’m still getting used to the new environment in Sepanggar. I don’t know..Maybe i’m getting bored of the 8 to 5 work life and ready to find something new and exciting. I realize that I get bored easily. If its too monotonous and mundane, I’ll get bored very quickly.

This new environment is another process of self-discovery for me. Since working here, I got to know some character traits in me that I was not aware off before or denied having. First discovery: I like to be involved in small to medium sized projects. I don’t like mega projects. I discovered this recently. Large projects have the tendency to fail. I mean, all projects fail but large projects, when thay fail,  they will fail at large scale with no hope of recuperating at all. Small projects, on the other hand, fail at a smaller scale and the effects it has on others are minimal. It is also easier to rebound from the failure and maybe just create something else from scratch. Second discovery: I like the simple life and things to be simple. So, you will never see my Facebook status showing “its complicated” again.-:) Even now, I yearn for the simple pleasures in life, family and friends and other stuff that matters. I also notice the tendency for me to go for small and simple assignments as opposed to large and complex projects. For example, I am starting to learn about the web and also starting to like it. The web, in all its complexity, is actually simple. You dont need to have a degree in Computer Science to build a website. I also find that web-related projects are simpler and less of a hassle compared to those so called enterprise projects that companies usually spend millions on. Third discovery: I tend to overestimate my capabilities. This is very true. When I’m given an assignment, I will probably say that it can be done in a day-:) But I know now that I’m no Superman. Some things just can’t be completed in a day or even a week or a month. Well, at least now I know that I am average and thats a good discovery actually because I can only become better. At least the confidence is still there.

So, work has been a process of self discovery for me. Sometimes painful but at the end of the day, all is good. The experience will prove beneficial for me as I chart my next step. So, what is my next step? All will be unveiled in my next series of ramblings.


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